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Oftentimes, the strongest climbers you'll run into are not 'dirtbags'- those individuals who live out of their cars, climbing and travelling all day.

The strongest climbers are the ones who have strict training regiments-- they often have full time jobs and work out in the gym most days, then push themselves hard on those rare and precious days when they can truly perform outside on the rock. 

This is all good and well, but as I reflect on climbing and my life, I realize I don't love climbing as an achievement but I love climbing as a lifestyle.

Those endless weekends in Korea spent with the foreign climbers-- exploring new areas, having pizza eating contests, and celebrating life under the stars.

The hospital in Laos when my partner got a horrible stomach illness that lasted weeks-- we rode in a squeaky ambulance over bumpy, poorly developed roads and spent days in the best hospital in Laos where our room was next to someone who had dysentery and there was no soap in the bathroom.

My 25th birthday climbing 25 pitches and begging for belays from strangers in Thailand-- we skinny dipped in the ocean and watched the fireworks and floating lanterns above us ring in the new year. 

Camping all alone in the forest in Chile with nothing but my climbing gear, a sleeping bag, and a tiny stove-- the nights were so cold and long but it was peaceful in the Magic Forest and I did not feel afraid. 

Kimchi mac and cheese with friends in Washington-- summer rain was in full force outside, but we were warm and dry in the comfort of the built out van. 

I'm often disappointed with my climbing ability and always want to achieve more. With the ambition of city and career living surrounding me, I get caught in this desperate race to train hard and perform better. I spend my days in the office and my evenings in the gym, my successes marked by the difficulty of the climbs I complete. 

In this city with no seasons, the days melt into one another and before I realize it, 3 years have passed.

In this time, I've been working to climb but I'd like to live.